Vacation needed

We are headed to Hawaii in 5 days and it is much needed.
I went in this morning at 8:30 am to get my blood work. If you didn't know, after I do the IUI I start progesterone shots and this holds in the uterus lining so I won't get my period if I'm not pregnant and we only can tell through the blood work. After the blood work I headed off to Disneyland with my mom and sis and Brinley to distract me until I got the phone call. We had left and getting baby stuff back in the car when I got the phone call. I acted like I knew it was going to be negative when the nurse told me that it did NOT work again. Although I was disappointed, I was also in shock so I just seemed numbed. I had to switch my thinking right away and get excited and pumped to move onto IVF. I know I feel like I said that a few months ago, but we decided then do wait and do the Laparoscopy and Hysteroscopy surgery (which I'm still 100% happy I did that first because we found Endometriosis that I never knew I had). So now that IUI #6 hasn't worked I have to stop taking the progesterone shots, wait for my period cycle to show up, then order all my IVF meds and wait for my period cycle to start again. Then we will start harvesting a whole bunch of eggs to retrieve. Once we retrieve them all, more drugs...more drugs then the following cycle we will do a frozen transfer.
So until then...Aloha!

Short and not sweet

We had another failed IUI.
Even with great numbers and everything looks perfect for an IUI it didn't work so our Dr. suggested to go on to IVF (In-Vitro).
Right now I'm still in a low place but we are taking a month off to prep my body for IVF and then in March hopefully do that. I'll update more for  me to keep a record of everything when I'm feeling more up to it.
Thanks for all the love and prayers....

Failed IUI round 4

I didn't even come on this blog all last cycle because I'm just getting depressed writing over and over again that things are working. I know someday I will get pregnant again because we will do anything we can and even go into adoption when the time is right, but for down I am really bummed out.
Here's just a recap of our 4th IUI with injectables:
I love love love doing the injectables over taking clomid. I didn't have any side effects and it was more pleasant. I ovulated a lot earlier than any time before and we did the IUI on days CD 10, & 11. Back to back IUI's with great numbers too...everything was looking great! I had 2 follicles, one on each side and they were measuring well over 21mm. In every way possible, again I thought this was the one. I was sending good vibes to everyone and doing seriously ALL I COULD. and maybe that is just it.
This time my Dr had me start progesterone suppositories every morning and every night. They go right up your yang yag. It is not so pleasant at all, but this help keeps the uterus lining strong and not shed (bleed). Therefor I knew no matter what I would go in on Friday, Dec. 13 to do blood work.
I went in this morning and had to bring my daughter with me, which was very quick and easy as they took my blood. I asked her if I could switch to the progesterone oil shots because I liked them better and my insurance still covers that. The nurse was so nice to call it in to the pharmacy. Then later that afternoon, one of my favorite nurses had to call and give me the news I did not want to hear. I was so bummed and still am. She told me my progesterone was not back down to zero so it would be a few days before my period would actually come back.
oh the joys of infertility. Thank you for all your love and support, we will get through this, but I'm sure this next round being over Christmas and New Years I may not do much blogging.

Failed IUI round 3

Just when I had hope and was so positive, I woke up this morning and once I got out of bed and started getting dress to head into my blood test, I started my cycle!

Blah!

Starting a new round now, but this time I'm excited. My dr. likes to try 3 round of clomid and iui with trigger shot and u/s to monitor everything. Then if that doesn't work, (like us now) He does  3 more rounds of iui but this time we are using a newer drug, injectables. I don't know much about it but those that have done ivf do because it's the same medicine just a lower dose. Even though I though I was being closely monitored with all my previous IUI's I talked to the nurse and she told me what it will be like this time around and its crazy more! Like every other day ultrasounds and blood work then after half way its a daily ultrasound and blood work. 

Failed IUI

I want to look at the positive side of things but another just needs to vent and cry more.
I was so so sure that my body was doing what I was hoping for. I really even had myself convinced that 2 or 3 eggs fertilized, and was really looking forward to that! I was hoping for so much more than this, but something do not come even when we do all we can physically and spiritually.
I had an 7:30am appt. tomorrow to go to the office for my blood test, but just 12 hours before I started bleeding. It's been a hard enough night, I just want to go to bed...

1st failed IUI

It's hard to sit here and say what I'm feeling because I have so many different emotions.
Dreams of becoming a mom to many never seemed like it was going to be hard to get there. After struggling to become pregnant naturally I was scared but ready for modern medicine. When we got pregnant on our first treatment I was so surprise and excited, I thought we found a solution to our problem and we would go on having as many kids as we like.
Well,
Life throws us curve balls and keeps me looking for strength in my faith and beliefs.
The day is not over yet, but I've held on to my little miracle a little longer and requested for more kisses than ever. I knew she was a blessing and I could never take her for granted, but when you have a failed pregnancy you really hold on tight to the ones you have.
I want to say I knew this was coming...
but honestly it could have gone either way and I would have a list of reasons why I knew I was or was not pregnant.
I was scheduled to go into the Dr. office tomorrow for the blood work but I woke up this morning to an unpleasant surprise, my periods came.
Just so you know having a child already does not make this part any easier.
It's been a roller coaster day of emotions, but I will lay my head to sleep tonight and wake up happy and ready to start round 2 of IUI. Keep us in your thoughts and prayers that we will be able to have more kids.


9/23/11- BFP (baby girl born 6/1/12)
9/25/13- BFN (1st failed IUI)